I had some interesting experiences this weekend, the first of which included accidentally breaking a contact lens in half. Because I have very bad eyesight, I wear rigid, permanent contacts that cannot be easily replaced. I only have one pair. As a result, I had to wear my glasses, which happen to be broken and held together with tape. A black Sharpie helped to disguise the tape.
Before coloring the tape, I was worried about being in public with my "nerd glasses" on. Besides that, they were cheap glasses, and the plastic coating on the lenses is beginning to shrink or something. There are strange scratches all over their surfaces, and these cracks resemble the cracked mud of a desert that had been heavily rained on, then left to dry.
These glasses change my appearance from what I have deemed to be "me." Somehow, the me with glasses isn't really me, and people react differently to me when I wear my glasses. Perhaps this is because I seldom wear them in public, and people are surprised I wear glasses. Other people say they make me "look smarter" or "look more like a professor" or "look more serious." Really though, I'm the same as I ever was, maybe a bit more self-conscious. As a result, I get more curious about looking at myself in the mirror. Because of the lenses in my glasses, my eyes appear to shrink when I put them on. I had never noticed this before until a significant other point it out and told me she didn't like how I looked with my glasses on. Did this one little comment forever doom me to not liking my glasses? Or it is just the stupid masking tape holding them together?
So, my question is: Why do subtle changes in how we decorate ourselves affect how we perceive ourselves? Why do the same subtle changes affect how others perceive us? And why does it only take one little comment from someone else to change our self-image?
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8 comments:
i like you in glasses <3
Now I'm feeling much better about myself. All it took was that one comment. Thanks.
i think we end up more self conscious about what wear because it is something we have complete control over which reflects more about who we are internally than things we have no control over (except for drastic surgery) such as bone structure, proportional body parts, or symmetry. if you see someone naked the only things giving away their personallity or their mind is how well they maintain their body and how they groom themselves. so subtle changes in things of such free will as clothing relfects a lot on a person's personality, not that how we adorn ourselves makes us who we are its just how we wish others to see us.
Hey bheinz, those are some really good points. However, I am not choosing to wear these taped up glasses. They are the only way I will be able to drive, read, write, and stare at myself in the mirror, all of which are pretty big parts of my life right now.
And you forgot about tattoos. Are tattoos to be considered a permanent article of clothing, then, since they are also chosen by the wearer? Is someone with a tattoo not really naked, or is someone with a tattoo even more naked because they have indelibly inked a "reflection" of what's inside them on the surface of their body?
Certainly we're formed by our reactions to others. My advice would be to read Denise Riley's The Words of Selves. Like penicillin to the clap, this will clear everything right up.
it all depends on the purpose the person got the tattoo for. some are meant to be completely revealing and others are meant to disguise and try to hide certain insecurities. clothing works much the same way. but like all physical features it only hints at personality and character and does not define those attributes.
"And why does it only take one little comment from someone else to change our self-image?"
Great question! Put another way: If you hear 100 good remarks from others about yourself, and 1 negative one, which one will you hold on to?
I had something intelligent to add here, but I'm now distracted by the blogger identity name of "donkeysneeze" and forgot what I was going to say...
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